As we go about trying to put into practice the principles of forgiveness, one of the most common questions that arises in the minds of most of us goes something like this:
Well, just how can I tell when I have truly and completely forgiven an offender? I mean, I think I have forgiven so and so, but how do I know for sure?
As we answer this question, we will actually be learning how to practice jubilee forgiveness. We answer this question by bringing into play once again the story of Joseph. We can all agree that Joseph was a jubilee forgiver, was he not? He totally and completely forgave his brothers, didn’t he?
Let’s review the life of Joseph from the standpoint of forgiveness. As a teenager, he has the double dream. He tells his family about the dreams, and then the older brothers get very jealous and resentful of Joseph being their father’s favorite.
They plot to kill him, but ultimately, they end up selling him to some wandering slave traders. Joseph becomes a slave in the household of a very important man in the government of Egypt, a man named Potiphar.
Joseph’s great administrative abilities are recognized by Potiphar and soon Joseph is put in charge of all the household business. Meanwhile, Potty’s wife, Zelicah, has been lusting after Joseph and one day she tries to seduce him. Joseph resists her advances and as a result she accuses him of trying to rape her.
Potiphar has Joseph beaten, thrown in the prison and his feet bound with chains. Joseph had much to be bitter about. Man’s thoughts go like this: Since I was faithful and resisted that great temptation, then God ought to bless me. But instead Joseph gets sent from being a slave to being a slave in prison.
Let’s apply this to our own life. Has there been an occasion or two when you feel you achieved a big spiritual victory, perhaps resisting an opportunity to commit marital infidelity, or such as resisting the temptation to steal something sizable, whether money or property? Surely, we have all been tempted in major ways, and hopefully, by the grace of God, you passed with flying colors.
But then, instead of being blessed, God seems to have dropped the bottom out on you and you just end up going lower. Has that ever happened to you? You don’t need to answer that because I know you people in this room and I can answer that for you. I know how that most of us are hurting in numerous ways. Likewise, I would suspect the same is true of every believer on our CD ministry.
At that point, we wonder and we cry out to God in our spirit, and maybe even out loud:
“God, what are you doing to me? I am trying my best to do what is right and this is the thanks I get! I’ve been trying to serve you—I resisted Zelicah, or whatever your temptation was—and now I lost my job, or perhaps you were in an automobile accident, or perhaps someone close to you has come down with some dread illness, perhaps you yourself are the one afflicted.
Simultaneously, we feel that “old man,” come welling up inside us, the Adamic man, that old carnal nature that wants to scream out at God: “Is this the thanks I get for serving you?”
So let’s remember Joseph. How did he respond? We have to assume that he kept his faith and trust in God, that despite now being unjustly accused of rape and tossed in prison as an innocent man, that Joseph also wondered what was happening and why.
Here I am reminded of what the great English preacher, Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones was fond of saying: “The worst thing that can happen to a man is for him to succeed before he is ready.”
We, having scrutinized the life of Joseph in the previous series of lectures [30 nearly one-hour lectures in CD albums, $110 ppd.], can see with perfect hindsight that God was not finished preparing Joseph yet for the tasks which lay ahead. God did not want him to succeed before he was ready.
In the prison, Joseph must have thought every day about the prophetic dreams he had as a teenager, and he must have had many occasions to fantasize about the day when his brothers would all bow down to him, and he would tell them then: “See, I told you so, but did you guys believe me!? Nooooo. Well, I’ll show you who’s boss now.” And on and on.
We don’t know how long any remnants of that type of carnal thinking may have lingered in Joseph’s character, but it is possible that it may still have been there to some small degree, even until the baker and the butler were taken back out of the prison.
In any event, certain aspects of Joseph’s character still need refining in that furnace of affliction. Perhaps he need to learn more about dealing with bitterness, resentment, and anger.
Perhaps Joseph needed to learn more about patience, perhaps more about faith and trust in the heavenly Father, perhaps more about longsuffering, perhaps more about jubilee forgiveness—perhaps all of the above, and other virtues as well. But when the time was right in God’s timetable, Joseph would come forth.
So applying that to ourselves, God has a Plan for you and me. I think we can safely say that it is not likely that any of us are being prepared to be some sort of high government official as Joseph was, but whatever God’s Plan is for you, just remember that God does not want you to be unprepared either, and so he continues to refine us all in the furnace just as He did Joseph.
Here’s another small but very important lesson from the life of Joseph. After many years in prison, you recall how the baker and the butler were tossed in with Joseph. Then one night they had their weird dreams and Joseph gave them the interpretations.
Since the baker was going to be executed, Joseph then asked the butler to put in a good word for him with the Pharaoh. He said to be sure to tell Pharaoh my story, how I was kidnapped and sold into slavery, that I am an innocent man unjustly accused and convicted of a rape I did not commit.
But what if Joseph’s plan to have the butler intercede for him would have worked? What would Joseph likely have thought if he had then been set free? Well, he would have been able to credit his own wisdom and resourcefulness and God would have been deprived of some of the glory.
You see, Joseph’s release had to come about in such a way that it was totally unexpected so that only God would get the credit and it would not be due to Joseph trying to manipulate the situation. So the answer to Joseph’s prayer for release from prison was delayed.
Here is the lesson for all of us. When it appears that God is not answering our prayers, it may be that He is simply delaying the answer. And that is His answer for us at that time is “Not now, my son,” or “Not yet, my daughter.”
Here now are seven practical tips, mostly derived from the story of Joseph, seven tips on how to be a jubilee forgiver. Some of these you will recognize from previous lectures on what jubilee forgiveness is and what it is not.
1.) Don’t tell anyone about how you were offended.
I would suggest there are two exceptions to this. First, if the offender is not your spouse and you and your spouse have a confidante relationship with each other, which is a mark of a good marriage, then by all means share it with your spouse for mutual support and encouragement in striving to forgive the offender.
The second exception is when it is important for victims of traumatic crimes or offenses to seek professional help. A woman who is being beaten by her husband, for example, should take action to let someone know, to get outside help. So we are not saying for the victim in such cases to “just keep to yourself, to tell no one, just forgive.” Not at all.
What we are talking about here is illustrated by Joseph when his brothers came to Egypt the second time and Joseph threw the big banquet, remember that? Then as the brothers prepare to go back to Canaan, Joseph commanded that his divining cup be placed in the mouth of Benjamin’s sack.
Shortly thereafter, when the brothers are all brought back before Joseph again, Joseph can’t hold himself back anymore, and so what does he do?
Genesis 45:1 Then Joseph could not refrain himself before all them that stood by him; and he cried, Cause every man to go out from me. And there stood no man with him, while Joseph made himself known unto his brethren.
That is significant in terms of forgiveness. Joseph did not want any servants, or soldiers or any Egyptians or anyone else there in his presence except him and his brothers. Why? Because Joseph was virtually the godfather of Egypt. The Egyptians revered him.
Had the Egyptians learned that Joseph’s brothers had tried to kill him and were responsible for selling him into slavery, the whole population of Egypt would have hated Joseph’s brothers. But Joseph took steps so that no one would ever know. He protected the reputations of his offenders.
Did you know that this is how God treats your sins and mine? When you have confessed your sins (in private to God alone), you can rest assured that God is not going to blab them to anybody else.
We all know how banks and insurance companies and internet merchants all have statements about your privacy rights. We may not read them, but they are there.
Well, God gave us our privacy rights in His statements as well. One of the places is in…
Micah 7:18 Who is a God like unto thee, that pardoneth iniquity, and passeth by the transgression of the remnant of his heritage? he retaineth not his anger forever, because he delighteth in mercy.
19 He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea.
Here’s another…
Psalm 103:12 As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.
No matter where you are on earth, east and west will always be 180 degrees apart, so God is saying that he will protect your privacy that much. No one will ever know.
Now think about Joseph’s situation. If Joseph had not already forgiven his brothers, then what a tremendous opportunity for revenge he had. He could have ruined his brothers for life simply by letting it be known outside the family what they had done.
But because Joseph had learned to practice jubilee forgiveness he set them free from that concern. This action that Joseph took to ensure that no one knew what they had done, that is proof that Joseph had completely forgiven his brothers. So how do we know if we have completely forgiven someone? That’s one way.
Then, some of you might be thinking, well, what about the harshness with which Joseph had treated them up until this time. What was that all about? The answer is that it was a series of tests that Joseph had devised.
But… the tests were not to determine if he was going to forgive them; he had already done that. The testing was to determine the level of reconciliation he could achieve with them. We will come back to this scene later as we discuss other aspects of practicing jubilee forgiveness.
Therefore, the flip side of this is to ask, why then, do we tend to blab to others how we have been offended by so-and-so? Why do we do that? It is because we want to punish our offender by hurting his reputation, right? Such action marks us as a carnal Christian, so let us pray God for His grace to resist that temptation always, shall we?
(To be continued.)
~END~
